Growing up

I woke up this morning and i was inspired by the beauty of the rising sun. This was like the heavens telling me it was necessary to rise from the ashes like a phoenix. Its beautiful you see, because no matter how heavy a storm is, or how much damage it causes, the sun always shines. I have watched people and interacted with some of them and in the end, i have been amazed. I have seen strangers become close friends, i have seen friends betray and become strangers. I have seen people face obstacles and move on and i have seen people hold on to things and never let go until it ate them up from inside. I have watched people carry other people's business like it was their's without even knowing the truth about the business. I have seen people eat up another person's life and come up satisfied.
I wonder if it is a ground breaking event to grow up. I question how hard it is to mature out of the protection of childishness. I personally feel it is an easy feat if we put our mind to it but i have been informed it is harder than it seems. I have seen, so i believe.

Magic

I just could not resist having two entries today. D'banj fans know this line: 'don't get it twisted, love is a beautiful thing' . I'm gonna twist that a lil bit: 'friendship is a beautiful thing' I love my friends. They are the craziest people i know. There are times i ask myself why i am so crazy and i look at the people i surround myself with and i understand. But still, it hits me, i love my friends. lol. i think i said that already. My friends catch me when i fall and advice me not to walk into the same hole. Get this, i am bloody stubborn, i walk into the same bloody hole and my friends still pick me up and dust off the dirt. I love my friends. I wake up on days and i don't want to face the world, my friends tell me the world should be scared of facing me and pull me out of bed.
I have laughed with them and i have cried with them and they have been with me through all of this. We have our fights and we laugh about how stupid we are and hug. There are days when i am so pissed i don't want to see anyone, my friends cheer me up and make me laugh so hard i forget what made me angry in the first place. When i face trials, i know i can run to them and the first question they ask me is "who do i need to beat up?"
Don't get it twisted, friendship is a beautiful thing. I love my friends.

Walk a mile in my shoes.

I don't have big feet,
but you could never fill my shoes.
My neck isn't the strongest,
but it holds my head up high.

My shoulders hold much weight,
but i still walk straight.
My eyes have seen death,
but i don't keep them closed.

My lips have tasted poison,
but i didn't stop drinking.
I haven't experienced too much,
but you can't walk a mile in my shoes.

first meeting

I feel the rush of emotion
when our eyes meet at first.
love at first sight is a silly notion
this feeling i regard as thirst.

I want what you offer,
the feeling of love and care.
I see us both suffer,
we cannot ignore it's there.

The attraction is our cupid
I feel it push us closer.
you smile and i'm rigid
i gather what nerve i can foster.

Health issues

Lately, i have forgotten how it feels to be healthy. I don't remember how it feels to have a healthy appetite. I try to brush my teeth and i feel nausea creeping up as the brush touches my tongue. Smells appear stronger than they really are and choke me until i feel the usual nausea creeping in. I do not even want to talk about the the compressing pain in my chest. I woke up yesterday morning and for five minutes i could not inhale or exhale; i could feel myself suffocating on nothing because the pain in my chest restricted me from the normal exercise of breathing. I find myself walking on a normal day and having waves of dizziness hit me like an unmanned trailer on an expressway. Oh yes, and the weight loss. The saddest part of all of this is that i am being pumped daily with drug after drug. I hate hospitals and i am mad scared of syringes but lately i have had to let go of my restrictions in my search for health. My mother told me some days back that i had all these problems because i did not drink enough water. wow! i thought. i am gonna start drinking a lot of water. What's the worse that could happen? the excess water over hydrates my system causing my tissues to swell with the excess fluid and me to drown from water intoxication or hyponatremia?lol

Superstitions

Today was hilarious. A friend of mine came into the room with this website open on her laptop. Its a website that answers any question you ask. Right! that's what i was saying up until i got a question about myself answered. It freaked me out and got me thinking alot about superstitions and faith. The 'answerer' in question insisted on faith in order for our questions to be answered and everytime i asked a question it told me i needed more faith. Now i am thinking just how much faith do i really need in life to have my wishes come true. Religions preach faith in order to move mountains, now, this website was preaching faith too. I jus have one question I hate the location of my dorm. If i had just the right amount of faith, could i move the building closer to where i have my classes? That's a question peter.

Midnight within

I lay awake and listen
My thoughts trail to you
crickets invade the silence
moonlight casts an eerie glow
where can i go?

I think of happy things
sad things creep up
being held and caressed
the emptiness within
i think of many things
as i lay awake and listen